Saturday, December 20, 2008

Diva Cup FTW.

Once again, here is some vagina talk that is pretty much TMI even by my usual standards. I'll give you a minute to navigate away from the page if you don't want to read it.




Still here? Freaks. :P Don't say I didn't warn you.




So it turns out the Diva Cup is pretty much the greatest thing ever. I'm about 4 days into my period, and it's the most comfortable one I've ever had. When I was considering the switch and researching it, I couldn't actually find a lot of detailed user reviews-there was a lot of general "I like it" type stuff, but nothing actually addressing specific things I wanted to know. So, here is everything you never wanted to know about my bloody cunt and would therefore not ask.

My first impression of the cup was "OMG it's huge and will be horribly uncomfortable." Turns out I was almost right. It is a little bigger than I expected, but I am also using the bigger of the two available sizes. Not because I have a gaping, cavernous vagina (I don't, in case you're curious) but because I have spawned. Size 1 is for women under 30 who have not had children, size 2 is for women over 30, or of any age who have had children either vaginally or by c-section. So I'm not sure if size 1 is less intimidatingly large. Anyway, back to my story.

Insertion is not an issue, because you fold it up to put it in. Once it's in properly, you really don't notice it's there. Removal, however...the first couple of times were awful. But, as with so many other things that involve vagina, it's all about relaxing and finding the right angle. Once you get that sorted out, it's easy.

Using the Diva Cup forces you to reach a whole new level of being comfortable fishing around in your vag. There's no handy little string to pull on. There is a stem on it, but you don't want to leave it outside while wearing the cup or it pokes you in the labia. Not so much fun. So, you have to actually stick your fingers in there to take the cup out. Insertion and removal do take a little practice to get the hang of, especially insertion. But you can actually practice while you're not bleeding if that will help you...get used to the action without all the bloody pressure. The last thing you want is to be in the bathroom on your heaviest day, all emotional with blood on your hands going OMG WHY CAN'T I GET IT IN? Trust me. o_O

On the subject of not bleeding all over the place...OMG SRSLY AWESOME. I slept in the other day and ended up having the cup in for about 12 hours. First, you don't risk TSS with the Diva Cup, unlike tampons. That part is awesome. Second...okay, so it was kind of overflowing when I got up. But after 12 hours, there was just a tiny bit of spotting on the toilet paper when I wiped the area before reaching down there to take out the cup. I'll take that over my usual crime-scene mattress any day.

I'll admit, there is a bit of an ick factor. I mean, it's menstrual fluid in a cup. I'm all for accepting my cycle as a natural part of womanhood and all that happy hippie stuff, but it's menstrual fluid in a cup. Luckily, I'm fairly quick to overcome ookiness where these things are concerned. And if you're really interested in the intimate workings of your girl parts, there are little measurement lines on the cup so you can see exactly how much you've bled. (Bear in mind that the fluid is not all blood, so don't get all OMG I NEED A TRANSFUSION if you decide to follow that information.)

So, that's the Diva Cup. It rules all. I think I covered everything...

Coming soon, a blog post that is not about my period.

1 comment:

Heather said...

I'm not sure I could handle it. Literally and figuratively. However, I appreciate your description (does this make a complete wacko???) I'm also happy you found something that works for you.