Holy crap. I needed that.
Some of you may be familiar with my semi-regular crises. Twice a year or so, usually around seasonal changes, I completely lose my shit. This time around, after making myself and my family miserable for weeks, I decided the easiest way to cope was going to be running away from home. I needed a change of scenery and time to sort out some shit in my head. Unfortunately, time away for me is rare, and I knew I couldn't run all that far, so the whole "running away" plan looked pretty bleak.
Last night, a few things came to a breaking point all at once. Too much time spent inside my head combined with a few issues which some of you know about to push me over the edge. So, kind of on a whim, I got in touch with an old friend and jumped in the car. It was a long drive to make in the middle of the damn night, and somewhere around 1:30 AM I made a wrong turn and almost drove right into the South Saskatchewan (not *literally*, but there was a moment of "WTF am I doing at a ferry crossing instead of on a road"), but otherwise it was a good trip.
The drive gave me time to just think, not to mention some great scenery. Last night it was pretty dark, of course, but I saw a few meteors and a bit of wildlife. Today I had a better view of the landscape, and in addition to the standard bunnies and birds, got to see a couple of pronghorns just grazing by the highway!! It was AMAZING. I feel all sweaty and gross from sitting in a hot car for 4+ hours, but I don't really mind. The friend provided great conversation, passable coffee (:P), a couple of HBO comedy specials so I didn't have to spend the whole time thinking, and a shoulder to cry on when I finally couldn't dodge the issues anymore and momentarily lost it.
Now I'm home, and I feel better than I have in a while. I have a new perspective on a few things, and I feel like I'm really BACK, in more ways than one. It's amazing what a little time away will do. :D